November Resolutions.

I've been neglecting this blog. I feel vaguely guilty, but only vaguely, because I don't actually have time for concentrated guilt. If you've been waiting for a post, my sincerest apologies.

I know most people write down their resolutions on New Year's Eve (or Day), but as I've never really felt a connection with that "holiday", I decided a couple of years back that resolutions were better made during periods of change in my life. So, I made resolutions in February, after I quit my job and applied to grad school. And I made new resolutions when I got to grad school. And now, I'm going to re-do them again, because I'm burning out, and I need a new perspective like tuna need deep water.

I'm not alone, either - a lot of my fellow second years are also struggling with motivation, workload, expectations, and the bleak career future. Lots of us are also struggling to juggle the other brightly colored balls labeled "student jobs" and "volunteering." So. Here are my resolutions, which should last throughout the rest of the academic year, and maybe beyond, but I sort of expect to be making new ones as I furiously hunt for a career-related job after graduation.

1. Grad school does not equal life. This also falls under Keeping Perspective. I will work toward an even work-life balance that includes twice-weekly exercise (soccer and swimming, for now), solitude, recreation with friends, eight hours of sleep, time outside, and household chores, in addition to schoolwork and volunteering responsibilities.

2. I will eat healthily, and at home. For many reasons, most importantly a shortage of disposable funds, and health and comfort.

3. I will get out more. I have a habit of staying home, but that never leads to adventures. I require time outdoors and in the company of others in order to be happy.

4. I used to work only when I could focus 100% on the work I was doing. Meaning, if I was hopping on and off Facebook, Gmail, and Google Reader, I wasn't working efficiently, and I might as well take a break and come back to the work later. This works when I don't have more work than I do focus, which is sometimes the case, but does wonders when I have time for focused work and relaxed breaks.

5. Do you find that music alters your mood? I do. Sometimes, I think it makes focusing more challenging. Thus, I will try to listen only to productivity-enhancing music, such as classical music, when I am working. The latest Florence + the Machine album is reserved for strictly non-working hours.

6. I will prioritize my responsibilities to other people, over responsibilities to classes and assignments.

7. I will spend less time in front of my computer. 

The underlying foundation for all these resolutions? I only have this one life to live.

On Sadness

Is it truly a feeling of loss? A lack? Ten years have passed. Do I still know what I'd be missing? Do I understand what life would be like, otherwise? Am I missing what-might-have-been?

Or is it merely a memory of how I felt ten years ago?

"The Last Free People"

I found this today on my Twitter feed. Some interesting ideas I can't quite comprehend, like "uncontacted" and "last free people." It's incredible. Watch for yourself, and find the entire article here.

An Afternoon at the Coffee Shop

I had a moment of procrastination yesterday at my neighborhood coffee shop. These are the results, in a mostly un-edited stream of consciousness.

Sitting in a coffee shop - the local - by myself, but not alone, because there are other customers here as well. Hands loosely wrapped around a steaming mug of new coffee - my refill, for which I paid in cash - exactly, which is a rare occurrence. The sun is not bright, but the sky is blue and the windows are floor-to-ceiling, the kind that open in warm weather to extend the seating to a patio on the corner. My neighbor at the next table seems to be one of those who needs to attract attention by everything he does - making noises, bouncing around, listening to noises presented through the speakers of his laptop, fiercely punching the keys on the keyboard. He has also flipped through his book, which sent cool drafts of book and coffee-scented air my way - something I don't care for, as it invades the personal space bubble I have constructed around myself and which I carry with me everywhere I go. The second cup is not as delicious as the first, but at least it is warm. I have been distracted from reading about book history - after so many pages I need a break, lose concentration, find myself reading paragraphs without understanding or remembering the contents. Two others, on the other side of my irritating neighbor, have been discussing scripts and theaters and props. They seem to have been discussing the development of a play. Both are dressed snazzily, with wool coats and hats and patterned scarves. They left just now, sending cold air from outside drifting back around the shop, bringing goosebumps to my arms and face and shivers to my spine. So I wrap my hands around my coffee mug again and stare into space. 

I'll Leave Hibernation to the Bears, And the Snakes

No matter how hard I try to entertain myself in my warm, cozy apartment, it just never works for longer than a day. I might have a short attention span. Or I might have a serious aversion to doing things like chores, and mending, and ... other things "around the house."

Today is the second day I've been at home, and although I spent an entertaining forty minutes working out, and some productive time (read: one hour) working, I've been watching t.v. shows that, frankly, I'm not that interested in, and napping.

I'm getting stir-crazy. Cabin fever. Restless.

Tomorrow I'm going out. At least for a little while. Break up the monotony. Apparently, even though daydreaming and surfing the internet aimlessly is supposed to start the creative juices flowing, it's not something I've mastered. Yet.

Confrontational Skills

An awkwardly-named life skill, but useful all the same. Learning how to have difficult conversations is one of those things no one really wants to think about. Many people I know (myself included) would prefer to never have difficult conversations, if at all possible. However, holding one's frustration close to the vest and muttering for months about how inconsiderate people are is much more disruptive to internal peace and balance. Trust me, I know.

(Okay, I admit, I've read some advice columns that I've come across in my daily internet-trawling. But just because they're advice columns, doesn't mean they don't have good advice. In fact, you'd hope they would have better advice than some others, paid as they are to give it.)

I thought I wouldn't have to worry about these conversations concerning my living situation, since I am paying for a single-person apartment. Except, I'm living in a basement. In a house with thin walls. And a door from my bedroom to the rest of the basement. The rest of the basement, which apparently contains my landlords' washer/dryer and broom/utility closet.

This state of affairs has resulted in many frustrating mornings, with me trying to sleep in to the comfortably late hours of 8 or 9, and my landlords getting up purposefully and regularly around 7, walking around, getting breakfast, sweeping, cleaning, vacuuming, doing laundry... So I get woken up several times between those two sets of hours. Incidentally, I end up sleeping later to try to make up for the lost time between 7 and 8 or 9am.

Leading me to my next difficult conversation, which I mean to have on my way to campus to finish and start my essays due this week.

Update: I spoke confidently and without hesitation, and thus the conversation went remarkably well. Practice makes perfect? Readiness is all?

Yahoo! Pipes!

If you look closely, you might find a new item on my page down at the bottom right, just above my usually-inane Tweets. Check it out!

One of the many things I thought I'd never do but find myself doing in this Masters of Information program, is designing/developing a Yahoo! Pipe. Turns out it's one thing I really enjoy. But I guess that's not surprising, given how much I enjoy other Web 2.0 apps like blogging, Twitter, Facebook, etc. If you're not familiar with the idea, it allows you to connect websites, images, RSS feeds, maps, and much more, in a mash-up format. Mine's a plain old list, right now. I'm still learning the basics, but have definitely enjoyed putting the first one together, which is mainly about fashion, one of my extracurricular interests.

So. Have a look at the Pipe, tell me what you think... especially if you know how to add the results of a Google image search!

Nap Time as Metaphor for Essay Writing

I'm currently working on a hypothetical response to a request for a proposal regarding a hypothetical oil spill off the coast of Newfoundland. My goal is to design and discuss implementation for an information system that facilitates communication and effective goal-achievement in the recovery efforts. It might be the most difficult paper I've written. It involves analyzing a case study; many many summaries; responding to specific requirements; justifying my choice of requirements to address and the order in which I've prioritized them; considering problems and guidelines for implementation of the information system; and drawing a model of the information system. Whew!

So, it's due tomorrow afternoon, and I still have two or four of those subjects to cover, the model to draw and discuss, and the usual editing, revising and proofreading.

This morning I've finally gone over my analysis, which is what the rest of the paper is actually based on. (The solution has to fix the stated problem, right?) So, briefly, I feel more comfortable about being able to answer all the sections appropriately and well.

Which brings me to the metaphor. I recall very well one particular nap time in elementary school, I believe it was first grade. Back then I hated nap time, like most kids (what was I thinking?), and usually spent at least part of it chatting to my next-mat neighbor. One day we had to take a memory test. My name was whispered, so I got up and walked outside to the little table by the door where the teacher told me a story, which I was supposed to repeat back to her. I failed. At the time, I couldn't remember why my teacher got so mad at me. She told me I could try again later, and even though I protested that I could do it then, I got sent back to my mat. The second time, I realized how easy the task actually was. All it required was my attention, and applying myself.

I realize now I've not been paying attention to the story I've been trying to tell, and that paying attention to it is all I really need to do to succeed. I guess I'll find out if this metaphor still holds when I get my assignment back in a few weeks. Here's hoping it does!

"I'm pretty good at drinking beer"

I like staying busy. I do. Most days.

This summer has been challenging, because although I've been tending bar regularly, which I love, I haven't always had a day job. In fact, weeks have gone by between assignments. So nothing much has happened yet, aside from two failed apartment-hunting missions in Toronto.

Except I've realized how much I adore sleeping in, hanging out, and not having responsibilities during the day. It's awkward, this two weeks working and four weeks not, because not enough "in-between jobs" time goes by for me to get seriously restless. Which would create a bonafide desire to go back to work. No, I generally have just enough time to start loving not having a day job, and then I get a call. "Would you like to work today/tomorrow/later this week?".

"Would you like to work today" is unbelievably difficult. First such call received this morning, much much too early. Then it's a wake up quickly, get directions and information, hop in the shower, grab some coffee and out the door without breakfast kind of morning. Followed by forgetting the directions, mentally plotting the map and hoping I got all the cardinal directions right.

The next time I have a day free, which will hopefully be Monday, I'm not going to waste it. No, I'm going to find something exciting to do. Something new. And outdoors. No more taking free time for granted. The Universe knows I'll have little enough of it once I start graduate school.

Blah, blah, I'm stressed, blah, blah blah.

Looks like I fell off the back of the wagon again. Or whatever the appropriate cliche is for forgetting to write (or just stopping, without the excuse of forgetting).

I've been collecting, printing, and filling out all sorts of paperwork to register for a Master's of Information Science. There have been deep ruts, large obstacles and plenty of hopeful rebounds. I don't want to delve into the details, but right now I'm feeling cautiously hopeful (again) that things will work out.

In one day and a few hours, I'll be on my way back to Toronto, this time with my brother, to visit, tour, remove some obstacles and fill in some ruts (or at least learn how), and search for a dwelling. I'm not sure which is more worrisome, as both of the last two activities are equally important to my future in that Canadian city. Meeting my brother on the plane will be fun. It's been seven years since I've traveled with anyone.

Today I learned that being anxious or feeling stressed about something decreases one's ability to concentrate - on anything but the cause of the anxiety and stress. Not that I needed to be told that. It's pretty self-evident about 9 months out of the year. But now I know there's research behind it that says that everybody else does it, too. Anyways, I'm trying to ACT, instead of THINK, about the stressers (stressors?) - Causes of stress - in my current situation. Hence the avoidance of details. I also read recently, and this has stuck with me so far, about the motto: "fix it." I.e. Just do it. (Side note: All of the above wisdom comes from Real Simple magazine, aside from the last sentence, which is quite obviously Nike's.)

I realize this is pretty much meaningless blather, but writing is cathartic, and I happened to have my computer on my lap instead of my journal, which I temporarily have no intention of locating.

The Hunt for Djarum Specials, 6 June, 2010, Toronto

Mission: Buy two packs of Djarum Specials for U.S. residents.

Morning:
I walk past a Lotto Canada (Ontario?) Store, pause, turn back, look in, and because it reminds me of Italy's tabaccherie, I decide to make my first attempt. I go in.

I ask the little Asian lady behind the counter in the shoebox-sized store, Do you have cigarettes? (I have no idea where to buy cigarettes in Canada - they're not on display in drugstores. Hell, I don't even pay attention to where to buy them in the States!)

She says, yes. I ask, Cloves?

Again, the answer is yes.

Do you have Djyaroooom Specials?

She pulls out the Black, then one pack of Specials. I ask for one more, and she tells me she's only got the one; do I want one of the Blacks? I reply that they're for someone else, so I'd better just take the one.

She rings it up. I'm standing there with a $5 bill, ready to pay up. The till stops at $11.00. ELEVEN DOLLARS??

Good grief! I say. She chuckles, and asks if I want the receipt. I take it, and she jokes, show it to him. Meaning my friend back home.

So now I have one, but need two. One down, one to go, as they say.

Later that day...
I walk into another convenience store, this one larger.

Do you carry cigarettes? I ask again.

Yes.

Do you carry... Jiaarooom Specials?

He doesn't understand, so I try again. And then a third time. Finally, I say, Here: and pull out the pack I've already purchased.

He squints at it, and grumpily tells me no. I thank him and move on, thinking about airports and duty-free shops...

After Dinner, which I unwisely decided to make blueberry pancakes, I change course on a whim and walk up Yonge St, which is full of adult stores, run-down-looking restaurants and tacky souvenier stores, to see what I can find.

Lo and Behold! A couple blocks north, across the street, is a shop with a red lighted sign that reads, "TABAC". Thinking tabaccheria, again, I cross over to investigate.

There are big advertisements for cigars, so I ask just to be sure (yep, you guessed it!): Do you have cigarettes, too?

The very nice-looking man laughs and says, yes, that is why we're called a tabacco store... (well, sure, but whatever)

I explain about the prominently displayed cigar signs. He laughs again.

Do you have cloves? Is my next question.

We have Djaruhm Black and Djaruhm Special.

Oh, perfect! I say. One of the specials, please.

As he's getting it, I explain that this is going to make Johnny Appleseed* very happy, because apparently you can't get them in the States anymore.

He agrees and says you won't be able to get them in Canada for much longer - it's only a matter of time.

Oh? Why's that?

Legislation passed recently that prohibits all flavored tobacco products.

Light dawning, I ask, Because it makes them too appealing?

Because it makes them too appealing, he repeats.

I make a sympathetic face, until I realize Oh, wait! I don't smoke, so it doesn't bother me.

I can tell, I say, I'm going to be hunting more of these up every time I go home.

He chuckles, and says, well here's your first successful purchase.

I turn to leave.

And that, I realized as I walked away, was the first time I'd ever purchased cigarettes.



* Names have been altered to protect privacy.

Thoughts from Toronto

3 June 2010:

I love being in Toronto, vacationing by myself. Sure, it gets lonely sometimes, especially at dinner and in the evenings, when I (usually) have nothing to do. But I can visit the sites and places I want to, I can nap after lunch if I'm so inclined, and I can eat whatever for meals, including cheese with bread and apples at the hostel, or a slice of pizza by a fountain.

Vacation is always nice, because there are no immediate responsibilities. Except for catching the plane home, which I have struggled with before. It's not all idyllic for me this time, because I'm going to go home without a place to live in August, and I have other worries, but I have at least accomplished some things, and I know I like the city!! That's something.

I enjoy watching movies by myself, but it's even better to have someone to make faces and roll eyes at, and snort/giggle/gasp with.

Today I walked around the Annex, my preferred neighborhood for living, and a bit of Little Italy (which needs more exploring, I don't think I got to the heart of it) before my poor feet gave out. Then I came home, lunched, and napped. Ahh... Now I'm at the theater (my journal has that spelled - automatically - as theatre), waiting for Robin Hood to begin. With one other lady, also (so far) by herself.

I've just gotten back from the washroom and am now -- OH LOOK! It's starting!!

"Coming attractions are next. There is still time to visit the concession stand for refreshments." i.e. Spend your money here! Quick!!

That movie is So. Good.

Toronto List #2

1. Souvenir: Fake straw fedora, $10. Was I supposed to haggle.... ??

2. Longest Conversation: Stopped by two very chatty Save the Children employees in Kensington Market. Will never stop to listen to them again.

3. Love: The streetcars. So easy and so much fun to ride!

4. Hate: The rain. Wednesday, Thursday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday. Very glad I have my raincoat and sneakers.

5. Coffee Shop: The Green Grind, in Little Italy. Sustainable brews. Stopped in for a $2 double Americano, sat in a chair I want, was given part of the NYT by a fellow customer, and whiled away half an hour with the paper.

6. Worst Hot Chocolate: Coffee Zone, an emergency evening purchase that I regret.

7. Neatest Address: 859 1/2 Bathurst St.

8. Overheard on the Subway: "Toronto has two seasons: Winter, and Construction."

9. Latest and Greatest Book (and great for traveling and rainy evenings): Dracula, by Bram Stoker. No, it is NOT your typical stuffy classic. Instead, it's very well-written, very VERY suspenseful - and by that I mean, the author gives the reader tidbits of information that come into play later on, weaving the plot together... Did I mention it's creepy? It even gave me a bad dream. Delicious. And Riveting, in a page-turning way.

10. House-Hunting Status: Drawing a blank. I've decided this will be a vacation, as opposed to strictly house-hunting, which is pretty difficult when listings for August and September aren't up yet.

First Impressions of Toronto

A somewhat-chronological List:

1. Walking upwards of five hours cannot be called a "cure" for restlessness, as it comes with its own sensations of discomfort. Yet: I am not restless anymore, in fact I'm quite tired. Yesterday's resolution: Today I will take public transportation EVERYWHERE. I can't wait to try the streetcars!

2. I have not improved my eatery-locating skills in strange cities. Help! If you know any good cheap places to eat in Toronto, please comment.

3. Starbucks coffee should taste more like Second Cup Coffee. I have yet to try coffee and donuts at Tim Horton's. But I have plans to.

4. I like the Subway because it's easy to ride (buy a token, take it anywhere), it's roomy, and (so far) not crowded.

5. I don't like the Subway because it still costs $3 to go one stop, which would be heaven on poor abused feet, if I didn't feel the price was ridiculous.

6. I appear to be far enough south that summers are still uncomfortably warm hot.

7. Bloor St, although the site of many designer boutiques, juxtaposes those sleek trendy storefronts with ugly construction equipment.

8. The neighborhood I'm staying in is only slightly seedy.

9. People do speak a bit funny here, but it's not glaringly obvious.

10. Finally, the university campus is beautiful and I'm quite looking forward to studying here. Although I can't imagine I'll be so hard-up for a snack that I'd ever eat out of one of those hot dog stands that sit on St. George's waiting for starving studying students to get desperate.

11. I forgot to mention: I have a superb sense of direction when it comes to walking around cities. I successfully navigated shortcuts twice yesterday, and today located the correct cardinal direction to walk in when I couldn't immediately find the street I needed.

One for the Annals

Take note, Tacitus.

I woke up this morning thinking it was just another day. Hah.

I think I've mentioned before I'm a temporary employee at the moment. Currently working on a part-time assignment (and loving the hours!) at a condominium. Answering phones, emails, giving out parking passes, and the like. Not the most intellectually or mentally stimulating job ever. In fact, I'd place it near the top of the list of Un-Fun Jobs. However, it means a paycheck every week.

I'm filling in for the manager, who's on leave. With a small staff of two, this leaves me in charge, and the building engineer. Fine. He's helpful, and so far I haven't made many mistakes.

Add a long-standing argument between the absent manager and the present engineer, and I end up in the middle. Hello, awkward and uncomfortable! Good seeing you.

Throw into the mix a righteous headache, and you've got all the ingredients for a Bad Day.

So I called the temp company (my real, direct employer) to get some advice, sorted the problem, and marched off to the nearest 7-11 to buy some Excedrin. Where someone lets me in front of him in line, and the cashier mentions that I don't look good. As I take my money and turn to leave, he tells me he hopes I feel better.

How's that for an invitation to go home? Only, I have to stay an extra hour and a half this afternoon. I'd grimace, but that would hurt my head.

Staying on the Happy Side

I'm concentrating on Positive Thinking today. So I'm not going to mention the very Rude, indignant man who called this morning to ask about Flooring. Nor am I going to mention the virtual Peering-Over-My-Shoulder my supervisor is doing. I'm certainly not going to mention the Unpleasant Surprise I had this morning, or the fact that I've Lost my Sunglasses, apparently Permanently.

No, instead of discussing Unfortunate Happenings, I'm going to concentrate on the Happy Side of Life. Such as, working where I do now, in downtown Ballston, I have the opportunity to eat at the little Italian Food Cart Pupatella, which makes Excellent Neapolitan Pizza (the Best) and includes Eye Candy. Yumm. I ate the Whole pie, and don't feel overstuffed.

While Inspecting the Building, I got Coffee and watched about 15 minutes of the Caps' Practice. This, too, is a Pleasant Result of working where I do.

Lastly, I met the cutest little Pug today, name of Yoda. About the only Nice Customer today.

Surprise!

I suppose I should have been worrying about not having a job after today, for an unspecified (yet likely short) amount of time. In reality, I got a call this afternoon, and already there's a position available. No! I mean, Yay!

Right. Instead of wondering about when I'd earn my next paycheck, I was planning my two free workdays. Fate moves in mysterious ways. I'm sure if I'd been worrying, nothing would have become available. Since I'd put together a mental list of everything I wanted to get done tomorrow and Friday, I get an opportunity.

I might complain, but I'm not one to close the door on opportunity (does anyone remember the Mr. Opportunity commercials for Toyota? "And I'm knocking!").

Does this qualify for an example of irony? If it's when the exact opposite of what you're expecting to happen, happens, I would say yes.

So I'm off to work again bright and early tomorrow. Sigh.

Speaking of...

Speaking of ... Driving, I'll be glad to give it up. Someone once made fun of me by guessing that I drive like a li'l ole granny, given I don't own a car and (used to) walk and Metro most places. Not so. Not so, at all. Tell you a secret: sometimes I'm a bit careless. I won't go into details, but that's one reason I'll be happy to be a pedestrian again.

Speaking of ... Work (to which I drive every day), tomorrow is my last day! To cover living expenses, etc., I signed on with a temp agency when I quit my job (I know, the economy, yada yada). My first placement, which has lasted the past six weeks, is about to end. I should be sad, or at least ... not looking forward to it, right? Because I'll stop getting those handy paychecks. But, between you and me, I can't help but be pleased. I mean, this means my mornings are mine again! That, in my opinion, is reason enough.

Speaking of ... Lack of Income, it's official (as soon as I pay my deposit): I'm on my way to the University of Toronto! Perhaps I'll keep record here of the process of making my way North. I'll try, at any rate.

Resolutions and New Beginnings

For the past month, I have engineered more success in my "write more" goal than I would have expected a month ago, given my last post. The thing is, it's easier for me now to write in my journal at home than it is to remember to post on my blog during the average of two hours I spend at the library every other day.

Back at the end of January I quit my job - crazy, right, given the recession and economic downturn - but I hated it. Over the past month I have become my old self again, which is a much pleasanter self than the self I was working at my hated job. Right around the time I quit, at the beginning of February, I made some resolutions. I won't call them New Year's Resolutions, because I don't buy into the whole New Year thing. Never really have, except as an excuse to drink champagne. The ball drop does nothing for me, and I try to live with the philosophy that every day is a new day - why wait for the new year? Anyhow, as it happened, my life changed at the end of January, so what better time for resolutions?

Unfortunately I don't have them with me (they're in my journal, at home), but here are a few of the ones I can remember:

1. I'll laugh more. (So far, so good!)

2. I'll fake confidence until I feel confident. (This one is taking a little more work but I had at least one memorable, successful experience recently.)

3. I'll do one thing every week that scares me. (Really a Fail at this point, sadly.)

4. I'll write more. (Seen this one before.)

5. I should have added something about living a greener lifestyle, but I didn't - at least I have been doing so, even without a formalized resolution!

6. I will stop buying things on impulse. (A very important resolution, thank goodness I've been mostly successful so far.)

I must say, I never thought Santa Claus was such a heavy breather. He's sitting right next to me in the library, and it's very distracting!

A 7:45am Change of Heart

Disclaimer: I'm feeling optimistic and sentimental this morning, so if you're not interested in reading about warm fuzzy feelings and the like, Read No Further. Seriously. If you're okay with all that, by all means, continue.

This morning started out in the same way as usual (except that I now have an incredible, wonderful, dear programmable coffee-maker), with too little sleep the night before, getting up way too early - as in, before 6am, which is generally an unbreakable rule I have - and napping instead of eating breakfast.

And yet somehow, I feel different. It's not that last night was particularly good night, or that yesterday was a particularly good day. In fact, a recurring old problem of mine reared its ugly head again yesterday, putting me in a terrible frame of mind. I don't say mood because it was more than a mood.

Recently I came to realize that the past year has probably been the worst I've ever experienced, not counting the year I turned 17. Bored and frustrated at work, I found no solace in going (or being at) home. Quite the opposite, my life at home stressed me out more than anything else. Where do you go when you can't go home?

To get to the point, at some time on my walk to work this morning, my heart turned over. Or grew. I wonder if that's how the Grinch felt when he had his revelation. I can't describe it precisely, only I have my armour back, and nothing can pierce it. I feel the proverbial great weight has been lifted from my broad-but-slender shoulders. Now I have a metaphorical gorget with matching spaulders. I've been trying to convince myself for the past few months at least that life is too short to "sweat the little things" as it were. I sincerely don't want to spend my days fretting over the past year. Having a worrying personality complicates matters, but today just may have changed all that.

So starting today, I'm not going to let anything upset me that isn't entirely worthy of feeling unhappy. Not my knees, not long lines in a hot Dunkin' Donuts, and certainly not rude, obnoxious - make that Toxic - people.

I'm going to enjoy my morning coffee and the light breeze.